English can drive you crazy!

Today, as I was preparing my red table grapes for jelly I wondered

  • seeded grapes have seeds in them but
  • pitted olives have the pit removed.

At least I don’t:

  • Put out the lights – Take all the light bulbs out of their sockets and hang them on a clothesline.
  • Dust the furniture – Literally throw dust on the furniture with dusting powder
  • Change the towels in the green bathroom – Use scissors to change the look of the towels.
  • Draw the drapes when the sun comes in – Draw a picture of the drapes.
  • Measure two cups of rice – Pour rice in two coffee cups, stack them, measure them with a ruler, then dump the rice back in the box.
  • Trim the fat on the steak – Put lace trimmings around the steak.
  • Dress the chicken – Put clothes on the chicken.

Okay, some of those expressions are a bit dated, but the Amelia Bedelia books still make me giggle! And I would love to have that lemon meringue pie recipe that she made so well that Mrs. Rogers decided to keep her and learned to write the to do list in Amelia’s vernacular.

And finally here’s a gem that appeared this morning in one of my favorite comic strips:

Being grammatically precise, shouldn’t Louie (the dog) be the one to pick it up?

Check here for more of my observations of this crazy language.


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  1. Ha ha…Enjoyed this so much. My hubby see these types of things all the time. I remember one Amelia book called "Play Ball Amelia Bedila" and having to read it to my baby brother over and over. Fun memory. I remember a friend asking me why the plural of goose is geese, and the plural of moose is moose, not meese. Hmmmmm.

    1. My son earned a free book in the library's summer reading program today and the first one I saw was Amelia Bedelia! But I resisted and picked up Henry and Mudge instead (one of his favorite series to check out from the library).

  2. sometimes, my wife will say, "Let me see that ___" when she wants me to hand her something. I usually can't resist the urge to hold whatever it up and do my Barker's Beauties from The Price Is Right impression.

    She doesn't often appreciate my sense of humor, though.

    1. Your poor wife! ha ha! I admit, I say that one a lot.

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