Positive self-talk can be the first step to making the changes to achieve the life you want.
The way that you treat yourself in your own mind is more significant than most people realize. People often self-abuse or say nasty mean things to themselves out of habit, and the consequences of this are much farther reaching than they believe.
Last week was rough for me: I was beating myself up for being overweight, the worst wife and mother in the world, a lousy cook and housekeeper... you name it and I probably thought I was the world's worst.
While working on an assignment with my son, the universe told me to knock it off. He had to list 5 sentences he could use to keep a conversation going about bullying. One of his questions was "Do you bully yourself?" I think he meant to say "Have you ever been bullied?" but his actual question really struck home for me.
I do bully myself. And it makes things seem worse than they actually are. I would never tell someone else some of the nonsense I tell myself.
It is time to flip my self-talk around so I can achieve my dream life and be an example for others, particularly my son.
Positive Self-Talk Can Help You to See Yourself
When you look at yourself in the mirror, what do you tell yourself?
Whenever you tell yourself something really negative, you’re repeating powerful mantras that can influence everything about your self-esteem and how you see yourself in the world.
If everything you say to yourself is bathed in negativity. This makes it impossible for you to be able to be aware of yourself completely and it blocks you from being open to others.
When you spend your time saying uplifting things about yourself, you’re going to get a more complete picture of who you are.
This isn’t saying that's should avoid dealing with things you consider to be faults. It just means you see a lot more than those things alone.
Positive Self-Talk Gives You More Confidence
Speaking to yourself positively helps to boost your confidence. That's because you are directly acknowledging the things that are good about you instead of focusing on the areas where you feel that you fall short.
You’ll probably be amazed at how many ways you've been able to get past things using your own natural talents. If you've come this far on what you know now, then imagine how well things can go when you’ve continued to learn and improve yourself. Try to see where you will be in the future based on these positive things you’ve discovered.
Positive Self-Talk Helps You See a Positive Future
Now that you know that you have some great qualities, you can see how they might be able to help you in the future.
Are you a fast learner? Do you solve problems quickly? What are your strengths?
Having a better outlook will make it easier for you to see yourself accomplishing goals in the future.
As you go through life, meet the objection of your inner critic with confident self-talk. Tell that part of your mind to be quiet. Do whatever you need to do to move past momentary doubts.
Positive Self-Talk Helps You Control Emotions
It’s important to remember things won’t always be perfect. There can be all kinds of little snags that can push back your timeline for completing things. It’s important to stay level headed though, because when you spin out of control emotionally, things will begin to suffer.
Use positive self-talk to remind yourself of how resilient you truly are. Find inspiration in the progress that you’ve made to date. The more practice you have learning to control your emotions, the more success you will have. Just be sure to remain patient and kind to yourself, and you will get there.
Ways to Improve Your Positive Self-Talk
Talking to yourself positively is important for your mental health and future.... yada yada yada... but how do you flip the talk from negative to positive? Here are a few ideas.
Make a list of your strengths and weaknesses.
Create a physical list of your strengths and areas where you can improve. Reflect on each aspect, and think about the times in your life where those positive attributes have helped you to overcome something or solve a problem. How can those positive attributes help you to improve?
Some people find great success by looking in the mirror and repeating affirmations daily such as "I am the master of my destiny."
Personally, I hear Stuart Smalley whenever I try it:
And then I start to laugh, which releases endorphins which counteracts the cortisol created by stress and I end up in a happier place.
I am not knocking affirmations! Give it a try, it may work for you.
Create a Vision Board
Another great exercise you can do is to make a vision board. It helps to have visual representations of the things that you want to attain at some point. A new career, home, or vacation can be a long-term goal that you work towards.
Visit this post to see how I created mine and includes a download of some inspirational quotes you can print and add to yours.
Surround yourself with positive people.
Like attracts like.
Have you ever noticed that people who complain about life and believe the world is out to get them and are generally miserable tend to associate with each other.
Successful happy people also tend to associate with each other.
Take a hard look at your social media habits and followings. Do you feel worse about yourself after visiting Facebook? It might be time to make some changes. I just unfriended or hid a bunch of people whose constant negativity was dragging me down. I unfollowed a few pages that often lead me to a negative self image.
Read positive books.
Well, you had to see that coming, right?
One of my favorite books for re-training my mind to embrace the positive is Master Key to Riches by Napoleon Hill. Think and Grow Rich is great, as is The Power of Positive Thinking written by Hill and W. Clement Stone.
Master Key is the follow up to Think and Grow Rich, which most people took as being solely about making money. In the second book he goes in to detail about riches being good health, a happy family and more. I am overdo to reread it and just downloaded it to my Kindle.
Flip the Script
Start being kinder to yourself right now. You deserve it.
You are good enough. You are smart enough. And doggone it, people like you.